Declaration
I allow myself to dip into
A realm of virtual insanity.
My vision becomes skewed
As I tap my inner-most psyche.
Images dance before me
All seemingly relevant
But none close to coherent.
Should I stand proud and
Make my declaration of guilt
Or should I hold fast
To who and what I think I am.
Understanding is nothing but
An attempt at rationalization
For what I am unable to see.
Should everything thought
Should everything believed
Should everything imagined
Become all that I am
Or should petty declarations
Merely mark transitions
To a purer form of enlightenment.

Silence
The embers glow slightly
Urged by the ghost of a wind.
The landscape is no longer marred
By standing structures
Now only silence remains.
What once thrived
Now lies barren
Devoid of anything habitable
Or any remnants of life.
Not a sound is heard
Nothing moves
All is dead
All is gone.
The silence becomes reality
The silence becomes life.
The ashes of embers lie still
Tiny wisps of smoke
The only evidence of
What may once have been.

Lucid Death
Between all I know
All I want
And all I have dreamed of,
The results will only
Kill me.
What I have seen
And what I have heard
Must be illusions
With the intent to
Destroy me.
Too much has been learned
Too much has been assumed
To allow me
A lucid death.
Impressions dance eerily
As visions declare
What I wanted to see.
But in the end
No matter what
I believe
No matter what
I choose to accept
I know it will
Ruin my perceptions
Decimate my reason
And murder me.

Fire Within
I look fondly at my prize
Savoring all it entails.
I breathe deeply
It’s aroma wafting
Increasing the anticipation.
I close my eyes
And envision its taste
Quivering with the promise.
I hold it before me
Waiting just a bit longer
Knowing that time
Can only enhance
It’s effect.
My frenzy gone amok
Its allure too strong
I take in its power
It’s peaceful pleasure.
I sigh happily as
My face flushes
My body warms
And I glow from
The fire within.

Fozzy
I wearily tread the path
I’ve walked so many times before.
My steps are measured
Not by thought
But by ritual.
The scenery means nothing
I have viewed it
So many times
That it no longer holds
Relevance.
I see only the path
And where I know
It will take me.
The trail splits
Like it always has
And I head right
Like I always have.
I look again
At the beauty of the path
And forget why
I walk this route.
I stumble upon a rock
And re-awake.
I look around
And see the path I’ve taken.
It does indeed promise
Paradise
While the other seems
To offer only doom.
To the right I see
Happiness
To the left I see
Death.
I ponder again
What I haven’t since
The first time I was here
One path looks so
Enticing
The other so
Harsh.
But I’ve been down
The seductive road
And I have always
Ended up back here.
If walking the easy way
Has accomplished nothing
Then maybe the difficult course
Will have better results.
I head left
Into the cloud covered sky
And start to scale the mountains.
A storm brews ahead of me
But I am confident
That I will prevail.
The path narrows
And ultimately becomes
A mere line.
Still I continue.
The path ends
As the tempest
Screams with rage.
I press on.
I make my way as best I can
The wind so strong
That my eyes water
Just so they can function.
I fall to my knees
Trying to shield myself
From nature’s rage.
I crawl forward
But the storm decides
That I cannot continue.
I cower on the ground
As the assault form above
Abates.
I move a hand forward
And lightning strikes
In front of me.
Options suddenly
Become clear
I can push ahead
And die
Or I can go back
And live the same life
I have always abhorred.
I stand
Dignity allowing me
Poise in this decision
And I make my choice.

Caress
I reach with
The last of energies
For the waning rays
Of light.
But with optimism drained
I watch forlorn
As darkness enters
And the night
Slowly descends.
The last of hope lost
I crumple to the ground
And curl up
With in myself.
I ignore the dark
I ignore the misty shroud
That is entombing me.
My body trembles
From the cold
My eyes clench
To hold back the tears
Of irreplaceable loss
My mind withdraws
Into itself
Unable to accept
Its ultimate defeat.
Sensation gone
And emotion bereft
I can do nothing
But huddle
Alone and empty.
As my heart decides
To fail
A soft touch
Caresses me.
My organs shock
Back to use
Though my eyes are
Unwilling to gaze.
Another brush
Like a breeze
Prickles my skin.
Suddenly I am protected
From the inner
And outer chill.
I open my eyes
Now dry from lack
Of reasons
And look around.
I see nothing but dark
Only the blackest of pitch
Yet
It oddly holds
Comfort.
A sense of belonging.
I shudder at the thought
But then it seeps into me
My light
My salvation
Is forever lost.
What is left of me
Is that which cursed me
And that which is
My deliverance.
A ghostly hand caresses me
And I burn with its fire.
A dark embrace
Shelters me
And I feel secure.
An evil force enters me
And I leer at
All the possibilities.
The night overwhelms me
And I boil
Ready for the taste
Of blood.

Cube
As two shadows cast
Alternatives of
Light and dark
I gaze upon
The fields so green
And ponder realities
Both offered
And undefined.
Which light holds truth
Which shadow
Portrays sanity?
Impressions dance merrily
On the edge of my vision
Lures dangle before me
Temptations try to
Drown me in ecstasy.
The grass before me
Lush but finite
The shadows complex
But easily explained
The knowledge a burden
Hopefully forgotten
As the pageantry of life
Plays itself out.
Two shadows cast
Represent nothing
And maybe everything.

Purgatory
I stare intently at
The light I had for so long sought
A tear rolls down my cheek
As it slowly fades.
With one last attempt
I reach for its life-giving rays
But as it wanes
So do I.
I manage one more grasp
But my once solid flesh
Disintegrates
And my life force slips by.
I feel my body dissipating
As I look at the dying embers
And watch the light vanish.
Then the final night descends
And reclaims the only denizen
Who had managed to escape
Its evil darkness
For one brief, but glorious
Moment.

Your Death
The light gradually drains
From your enchanting eyes
The twinkle fades away
As your will to survive dies.
I gently caress your cheek
As your heart begins to slow
Your flesh becomes ashen
As your blood ceases to flow.
The pain finally subsides
And your senses turn numb
And to the weariness and haze
You dutifully succumb.
I lean over, and with a last kiss
I steal your final breath
And hope that the angels
Carry you to your death.

Blood Fades
The taste of blood fades
While the momentary glimpse
Of reality
Taunts.
Visions dance hauntingly
While truth presents
An image dreamed of
And abhorred.
Sight does not hold
Answers
Nor does hope
Pain is the only solution.
If it doesn’t hurt
Then it isn’t right.

Flower
I meandered through the pasture
Never seeing the rolling hills
Never noticing the flora
Never caring about the sights
Until I tripped.
I fell hard, my face smashing
Into the fertile ground.
I lay there for awhile
Dazed and horribly confused
Not sure of where I was
Or what I should do.
Eventually I gathered myself
And stood
Looking down at what had
Caused my dilemma.
A small flower was there
Still budding
And completely unaffected
By my errant ways.
I sat down next to the plant
And breathed deeply
Of its intoxicating aroma
I stared at its petals
Enchanted by the beauty
They possessed.
How long I gazed in admiration
I could not guess
But the one time
I tried to touch it
A thorn drew blood
And the blossom
Suddenly turned red.
I stood defiantly
Knowing that
I would no longer be rapt
And walked away.
I went home, back to my life
But the pasture kept calling.
Occasionally I would venture out
And check on the flower
Maybe feed it, talk to it
Help it grow.
Then I would leave
Even though it hurt more
Than anything I had ever done.
Still, I would return.
Shelter it in a storm
Protect it from harm
Nurture it.
Nothing else
Have I been more proud
Than when my little flower
Burst forth
To its full potential
Of stunning beauty
And ultimate growth.
But my job was done
And now I must leave it
To fulfill its destiny.
I grudgingly walk away
Head lowered
So I wouldn’t have to see
The conclusion to my
Perseverance
And the result of
The relentless bees.

© 2009 Ravenai